21 Weeks

Congratulations Lil Monster, you have achieved quite a milestone.

In our last ultrasound...here is a pic:

And here is a pic of the father...I think he looks adorable when he is asleep.

Anyway, last week there were a LOT going on that I didn't have time for anything.
Let's do a quick recap:
1. On my 20 weeks prenatal appointment I heard his/her heartbeat and everything was looking fine.

2. On Thursday, we had our 20 weeks ultrasound and Dr. Gomez insisted that the baby was REALLY big. We saw the charts and yes, is like 2 weeks ahead the rest of the average...so I got schedule for glucose testing ahead of my 28 weeks. One of the reasons of babies can be big is if mothers get gestational diabetes. Nothing really bad but you have to get in a special carb diet.

3. On Friday, big day for me. I got my US citizenship after 5 years of be living as a US resident in this country and be a role model citizen. Brad went with me on my oath ceremony. We were starving afterwards because it was schedule at 1pm and it started like in Panama at 2pm.

4. My primary OB/GYN told me to do the glucose test since Dr. Gomez was worry about the size of the baby. I have two doctors, one OB/GYN Dr. Siegel which is originally from Argentina and Dr. Gomez who is NOT from Latin America and doesn't speak Spanish that I know of. He actually looks Indian and he is my utlrasound prenatal sepcialist because I am over 35.

5. This Tuesday I got my glucose test, and I passed so I don't have any gestational diabetes and I can keep eating very healthy as I normally have been all my life.

I still don't have any "cravings". No sweets, no nothing really. So anyway, the baby is big so far. But I have been told that sometimes they just level and you get a normal weight kiddo.  And that's it for now. I haven't buy anything new, but I need new tops. We are not buying anything for the baby yet either.

School will be over in less than we think and that is going to be a great relief and finally time back to us. We are starting to think on nursery themes and what to do to avoid painting since we are renting. Another thing we are thinking to move to another place too, we realize there are things won't change where we at and we can't think that things are going to get for the better there.

The Sweetest Day of My Life

I don't like sweets as you know...yes, I don't like them.
I don't like the sugar and sweet flavor of it. I don't like chocolate, I don't eat cakes UNTIL now.

I woke up this morning freaking out because I couldn't feel Little Monster move. S/he ALWAYS move to my right side waking me up. S/he follows me all the time  (duh obviously) and move around when I am getting to work, and again gets in the right side. Today, there was nothing. Daddy had to poke you several times until you move. And then relief from both of us. But then, nothing again.

I called the OBGYN nurse and told me to drink something really sweet and cold and wait for two hours. Yarubi, my other friend told me to eat chocolate...your daddy got me a Sneakers...and now later on I got a piece of Tres Leches. Okay I got my sugar hype and now I am like sooo awake. And you FINALLY moved!!!!!

I was freaking out....is like carrying an egg in your mouth and you have to eat and talk at the same time without breaking it. Carrying a child becomes such a precious thing. I mean with all the stuff I have been through and the sacrifices we are making to make it happen until the end, now than never I felt you belong to me and you must suceed in your development process to the outside world. But stop freaking me out like that!!!!

19 Weeks

Here we go, that's my belly...and growing. I think this kid is going to be big, I feel my belly stretching...not so glamorous. I can feel Little Monster moving around...s/he loves the right side. Not sure what's the deal about it.
Little Monster is like the size of a big mango, 6 inches and almost 9oz. Next week is our 20 weeks ultrasound...can't wait in all honesty. I can't wait to see him/her and check out how big really is.

Okay, American Greed is on and we are hooked up in that show.

Uhmm not entirely sure about this belly pics in all honesty, but whatever.

Not much events, I started the week much better than last week so there is an improvement. Sleeping is becoming quite a challenge now because my right knee pain has come back, and I need to turn right and left and with the belly is becoming uncomfortable at times.
I am drinking more water, so there is a positive note there. I have been feeling quite tired and I think one of these days I am just going to fall asleep at work. I feel so slow...like a turtle.
Okay, American Greed is on and we are hooked up in that show. Later...uhhh Little Monster keeps moving a lot!!!!..to the right side, darn it.

Beer and the Little Monster

Little Monster,
I love you.
I can feel you move
And is funny you like to be in the right side of my belly
It feels like a hardball and when mommy and daddy put their hands over, you move away
Not sure yet what are your intentions
We are starting to think how you would look like
What I can tell you now is that even I am happy
I sam still doing one of the biggest sacrifices of my life
Not drinking beer
I know sound selfish
But I have work really hard and grow up until my 18's to be able to drink such wonderful drink
I hope that you like it too when you get in that age
I hope I don't have to see you like a stupid drunk in TV when we send you to college
Oh yes because you are going to college or you are going to work full time
No excuses
Mommy and daddy will use money to continue traveling
We will be old too old
By the way we love you
I just wish to be able to get a drink today or any other day
But some scientist said that is really BAD for you at this stage
So we are waiting eagerly for March
So when you are out the first thing after I have you in my arms
and while you are breastfeeding...
I know a cold nice beer will be waiting for me in the fridge

Maternity Clothes

Okay, I promised I will be soon posting pics of me and the bump coming up...stand by

Anyway so finally this weekend I went to Sweet Repeats to check out maternity clothes. I have been in Macy's checking those clothes as well, but be spending 30-40 bucks a piece for something I am going to use for couple of months is not worth it. So I went to this store and got crazy. I even have a sweater!!! and more than 10 pieces for less than $80 bucks. I think I have never enjoying shopping as yesterday AND the place was calm. It is small and not crowded.

Thanks to my friend Cherye gave me this magnificent band to use with my current clothes. That was the first thing I started to use...why I didn't think of it and I would be rich now? To my friend Cristina who gave me a couple of maternity clothes and sent it to me with my mom...those are going to start be in the fashion show soon.

By the way, maternity clothes in general are NOT pretty but you do not have much choice...so it's a give and take. Be comfortable is the key.

Case of a Mondays

It does exist, like today.

Yesterday, returning from grocery shopping I heard a weird bubbling sound coming from my car. Like when the coolant is gone...and your car is about to set on fire. But there is no temperature alarm, nothing that indicates that the car is "hot". I just stayed there trying to get an idea where exactly the sound was coming from. Since the car was hot I couldn't do much. But I knew it wasn't going to be good.

Today, I woked up and I throw up TWO times. You know I don't get that upset as before but I still get upset. It just so exhausting to do that. My entire body feels so tired like I did a marathon. And yes sounds silly, you get over it but it's emotionally and phisically an exhausting experience. I feel pitty for myself.

Today, I was hoping the car stay put and that was an one time issue. So before I started the car (and I was already running late) I checked the coolant and didn't like what I see...my car is dirty too, it disgust me. I never have been such non conscious of my car. I normally take care of my things. How possible I don't feel link with this car? Especially I call this car my "divorce trophy". I fought for it, I paid for it and it was mine, but it wasn't at my name...hence the fight for this car was crucial. I needed to have a little win over all the rest of the things that were coming to an end. So how possible I have left this car over 3K miles overdue in oil change? How possible I haven't take it to the Cactus Car Wash for a nice one? Shame on me...now I am paying the price of not  taking care of it. I haven't done a tune up in awhile either. Well, things will change today.

I left the car in a shop near by and said "check everything and call me to decide what it needs to do, he deserves it". And I said my car deserves it because it has take me when I needed it. It has help us to go to work while Brad's car have been in the shop for over a week. Of course my car doesn't understand that I am preggo and is Monday and I need to go to work on time...I get mad at him, but is not his fault either.

Anyway, like my boss said "if life give you lemons, made a lemonade"...good idea. I bought a mango yesterday I am going to do some mango with salt, pepper and vinegar...yummy!

Boy or Girl...should I care?

One of the many questions I get are:
"do you know the sex yet?", no.
"do you prefer a girl or a boy?" not really, I have no preference. I guess with a girl at least I know how things look...a boy penis size and testicles I have no idea how they suppose they should look like at that age, but I can ask Brad if he remembers.
"do you want to find out?" I wanted to know due to practical reasons...but now I don't.

WE haven't had that discussion yet, but now I really don't want to know. I think would be great to get that surprise. I don't want to put a pink room in all honesty, I know I don't have to. I don't like pink, I think is overrated. There are so many other colors that I think could be nice with pink but not ALL pink. All blue? I love navy blue, one of my fav colors. Actually all my bedsheets are with some blue on it. Towels too. But I wouldn't put a room all blue either.  I actually like Brad's clothes  more than mine most of the time. I think girls clothes are a mess. You dress like everybody else or you will get hard time to find your own style.

Actually I found interesting that we still have bias on what suppose to be boys and girls things. On girls all is "princess", "little lady bug" and such names...for boys...all is cars, "champions", "my little lion"...really? I think that animals should be love by both, and no you are not going to be a princess you better get your homework done and go to college missy...I don't get it. Yes, I know all the social standard crap that we keep being prisoners of, well that's your choice. Oh don't ask me yet if I will have a baptism...conversations already started, we both are not religious at all...so what's the point of baptism without religion faith? but that's for another blog. In all honesty there a lot responsibility on us for this kid. We already have to decide a lot of the things that s/he has no say about. But I guess that is my sweet vengence...you little monster I am not letting mommy having a nice pregnancy...hence I will buy you clothes and feed you and you better like it hahahaha. Mommy 1 - Little Monster 0

Anyway, so now I am in this dilemma...should I know? I am a practical folk but now I am just well I can have some mistery in all this already mistery-melodrama that is my pregnancy...why not?! So for me, I don't want to know...now I have to convince Brad if he doesn't want to know. Because if he knows I KNOW I will know...he will eventually tell me in one of his clown faces or annoying bothering games that he gets when he is asking for my attention. I said they are annoying but they make me laugh. Is good to have some clown in the family. It always good.

Hiking Mount Doom

I am a fan of the Lord of the Rings...hence the title of this post. Because I have been feeling like Frodo for four months and counting.

Perhaps my expectations about pregnancy have been in EACH possible way invalidated by the fact that each pregnancy is different and it is. I don't care if you had a great and nice pregnancy...good for you! Me? not so much. I don't think I will ever have another kid, not in 1000 years even if I have the power of living forever (which thanksfully I don't).

Yes, today's post is a rant against misery. That's how I have been feeling for four months. I don't feel in touch with this little monster at all. Is taking EVERYTHING out of me, selfish? yes. If this is the type of relationship we are going to have since the start I am going for a long ride and punishment. Hopefully my misery at that point will be share, let's say the father will be responsible of a 70% of it, HAHAHA

Second trimester is supposed to be the "honeymoon stage" well I never see my Bora Bora ticket coming in the mail. Did I miss my Air France flight from Los Angeles bound to the French Polynesia without noticing? How possible!!!?? I demand a refund!

Well, I guess I will continue hiking with the help of my best friend and see if I finally I am able to keep the strenght that Frodo had.